The Pillow

I have a pillow and I call it Emile.

It’s a buckwheat pillow. Buckwheat is supposed to be good for you. Its hulls provide orthopedic support – preventing neck, shoulder and back pain. The hulls are also thermodynamic, keeping you cool in the summer and warm in the winter.

Emile is my “cuddle pillow” – meaning, I put my arms around him and hug him tight.

Yes, I refer to my buckwheat pillow as “him”.

My husband does not like to cuddle, or be cuddled. He sleeps with an arm straight out – keeping me at arm’s reach, literally.

So, I was forced to look elsewhere for comfort. I found it with Emile.

Emile was named after Emile Hirsch, the American film and television actor best known for his roles in Milk, Alpha Dog and Into the Wild. After watching Into the Wild, I developed a “harmless crush” on the actor. I considered it a “harmless crush” because I knew that I would never act on it… or have the opportunity to act on it.

Or so I thought!

The husband and I went to a screening of Hirsch’s film Prince Avalanche a few months ago. We sat ourselves on the left side of the theatre, in the fifth row. We were discussing the Holy Roman Empire (and how it was neither holy, nor Roman, nor an empire) when I saw him.

Emile (the actor, not the pillow).

He sat down two rows in front of us, and was within spitting, or popcorn throwing distance (approx. 5 feet). He was just as non-traditionally handsome as he is in films and on TV and yes – I may have stared at him five seconds too long.

My husband noticed, and touched my arm. I looked over at my dear husband. He looked worried. “You love me, right?”

I wondered if my husband really thought that I might just stand up, walk over to Emile, confess my love/like, and attempt to suck his face.

Obviously, I would not (I’m way smoother than that).

I squeezed my husband’s hand as the lights dimmed. I must admit, I was distracted throughout the film. Emile (the actor, not my pillow) was on the screen, but he was also sitting just a few feet from me, laughing at his own jokes.

The lights came up. We all filed out of the throatier. My husband and I went home, together.

When I went up to bed, Emile was gone (the health and wellness benefits on the buckwheat pillow… also gone) and my husband was there, with open arms – ready for a cuddle.



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