I went on vacation for a fortnight (hence – not posting a blog for a fortnight).
I know what you’re thinking… “Kim’s whole life is one big vacation because she lives in California, and doesn’t have a real paying job, and also she probably just sits around watching The Golden Girls all day.”
To that I would say, “Rude.”
First of all, my life is not one big vacation. Yes, California is a very popular vacation destination and has gorgeous, sandy beaches and averages 257 sunny days a year… And yes, we all wear flip flops everyday and say “dude”… And yes, we always drink our cocktails with little umbrellas… it doesn’t mean we’re not working (unless we’re not working).
Secondly, I may not have a “real paying job” but I treat my writing practice like an actual job… which means that I sit at a desk and drink coffee and write stuff and occasionally take breaks to check Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.
Thirdly, The Golden Girls is only on from 8 – 10am on The Hallmark channel.
Anyway… I went on vacation for a fortnight.
For those of you who don’t know (and to you I’d say – read a book)… “fortnight” is a British term for a period of two weeks (seriously, there’s no excuse). The word derives from the Olde English “fourteen nights” (may I suggest going to Barnes & Noble or a visit to your local library) and is a commonly used term in England (unless of course you can’t read… and if that’s the case, I apologize), where wages and salary are paid on a bi-weekly basis (I was hasty in my reaction, and now I feel bad).
Anyway, I went on vacation for a “fortnight”… two weeks, 14 days (I’d be happy to teach you to read. Text me).
I went to Canada (what am I thinking? If you can’t read, then you definitely can’t text me. Call me instead).
Canada is always fun. I know, because I’m from Canada and P.S. I’m also very fun.
Canada is very “Canada” and the people are very “Canadian”.
That’s so Canada.
So Canadian, right? With the bear and the wide eyes and the photo being taken in some sort of log structure. Totally Canada.
I spent most of the fortnight drinking Tim Horton’s coffee, watching hockey, eating poutine, hunting for moose, shovelling snow, curling, wearing plaid, saying “eh”, tapping for maple syrup, and apologizing.
It was really great, but I’m really glad to be home in California. Back to flip flops, umbrella drinks and hard work.
(Okay, just realised that if you can’t read… you can’t text me, and you probably can’t read that bit about calling me instead, and you definitely can’t read any of this blog post… I’m sure you get the “Is” and “thes” sprinkled throughout, but I don’t want to assume… I’ll call you instead, ok?).